Faith EnFire wrote:
morning all
feeling accomplished...very close to getting my car fixed (rather than getting a whole new car)
and it's payday

Yay!

Faith EnFire wrote:
morning all
feeling accomplished...very close to getting my car fixed (rather than getting a whole new car)
and it's payday

I gotta go outside in the rain and replace a fuel filter on my car. Seems like a minor issue, but it has been causing me big problems. Hoping this solves them.

And it's payday!

Star Child wrote:



I gotta go outside in the rain and replace a fuel filter on my car. Seems like a minor issue, but it has been causing me big problems. Hoping this solves them.

And it's payday!

if i could pull my engine and put in a new one that would save me a lot time but....

wohoo for paydays

Faith EnFire wrote:
dang, I'm feeling creative but don't know how
is it model me, photographer me, hair me, makeup me. all three
and what do I want to express...don't know.
great now i have no focus at work

That is the sign of a truly creative soul. You're hungry, but you don't know just what for.

I'm off to work. Long shifts for the next three days

Star Child wrote:

That is the sign of a truly creative soul. You're hungry, but you don't know just what for.

I'm off to work. Long shifts for the next three days

have fun at work
I'm going to gnaw my creative arm off till i figure out what I need to do

Tim Little Photography wrote:
Hello my suicide and violence family. Today sucked for me. Therapy was a train wreck and everything in my life is in ruin. Any good thoughts or prayers will be so appreciated. I have a huge problem to find an answer to but its not something I want to make public, I'm too ashamed. If anyone feels like they are good at problem solving please feel free to PM me and I'll let you know my deal and look forward to your ideas. Thanks Guys, I love you all!

Tim

I'd love to send you a PM, but I've learned that I'm not so good at getting into the mechanics of specific problems.  General problems I can help with, but anything else I strongly urge that you restrict yourself to professionals.

My only piece of advice: shame is an emotion that prevents healing.  Learning how to beat feelings of shame is one of the most useful emotional-control skills you can learn.

Please keep posting even if you don't feel you can share.  We're here for you.

Lawrence Guy wrote:

I'd love to send you a PM, but I've learned that I'm not so good at getting into the mechanics of specific problems.  General problems I can help with, but anything else I strongly urge that you restrict yourself to professionals.

My only piece of advice: shame is an emotion that prevents healing.  Learning how to beat feelings of shame is one of the most useful emotional-control skills you can learn.

Please keep posting even if you don't feel you can share.  We're here for you.

Thank you Lawrence. I'm working all the resources I can. I appreciate your kind concern my friend.

Tim Little Photography wrote:
Hello my suicide and violence family. Today sucked for me. Therapy was a train wreck and everything in my life is in ruin. Any good thoughts or prayers will be so appreciated.

Sorry to hear that.  Good luck.

Tim Little Photography wrote:
Hello my suicide and violence family. Today sucked for me. Therapy was a train wreck and everything in my life is in ruin. Any good thoughts or prayers will be so appreciated. I have a huge problem to find an answer to but its not something I want to make public, I'm too ashamed. If anyone feels like they are good at problem solving please feel free to PM me and I'll let you know my deal and look forward to your ideas. Thanks Guys, I love you all!

Tim

hey,
I do like problem solving, but I don't know how good I am at it

sorry things sucked, sorry that therapy didn't go well...

Sometimes when I have a problem and i'm praying on it, I find i'm not listening. just talking. Don't let God-as I understand him-to get a word in edgewise. have you considered just a little meditating-long shower/bath, walk outside just to clear your head. God sometimes talks to me thru ice cream

Pm if you want some advice and I'll see what i can do. but I won't be able to get to it till tomorrow morning.

Hug Love and Prayers

E P O N A wrote:
Mornin.

Trying to hang in there.
It's a breathing day for me.

*hug*

E P O N A wrote:
Mornin.

Trying to hang in there.
It's a breathing day for me.

It's okay. Give yourself praise for small steps.

Lawrence Guy wrote:

*hug*

Thanks. I *really* need it right now.

Star Child wrote:

It's okay. Give yourself praise for small steps.

I'm slowly learning this, and I can't thank y'all enough for teaching me this.
(hug)

E P O N A wrote:

Thanks. I *really* need it right now.

*huggs*
me too

E P O N A wrote:

Thanks. I *really* need it right now.

If you want to talk in person I'm available tomorrow and for most of the week.  Today I already have plans that are difficult to get out of.

Star Child wrote:

*huggs*
me too

((hugs))

Lawrence Guy wrote:

If you want to talk in person I'm available tomorrow and for most of the week.  Today I already have plans that are difficult to get out of.

Yea, we gotta make a date for you to come over soon.

E P O N A wrote:

Yea, we gotta make a date for you to come over soon.

I'm good most days except Thursdays and Saturdays.  PM me?

Lawrence Guy wrote:

I'm good most days except Thursdays and Saturdays.  PM me?

Will do now.

Faith EnFire wrote:
hey all
hugs all the way around. looks like everyone needs one
and don't underestimate the difficulty of breathing. it's very complex. everything has to work in just the right order


so I had the creative bug. wasn't sure what to do. and it certainly didn't come out the way I wanted but thought I'd share the results.

reach by Moyer566, on Flickr

this one was just for fun

firelight by Moyer566, on Flickr

These are as awesome as you are Faith. Thank you for posting them!

Tim Little Photography wrote:
Hi family! Thank you all for your kind words to me during this terrible time. I hate to admit that suicide was even close to the back of my mind yesterday but I have to be honest to get better. I posted in the MM Market to try and fix my problem. Would you please send prayers or just good thoughts to those who are buying my services.

I love you all,

Tim

Link?

Also, (((hugs)))

Faith EnFire wrote:
hey all
hugs all the way around. looks like everyone needs one
and don't underestimate the difficulty of breathing. it's very complex. everything has to work in just the right order


so I had the creative bug. wasn't sure what to do. and it certainly didn't come out the way I wanted but thought I'd share the results.

reach by Moyer566, on Flickr

this one was just for fun

firelight by Moyer566, on Flickr

Love the first one with the passion of 1,000 burning suns.

E P O N A wrote:

Love the first one with the passion of 1,000 burning suns.

It's my favorite too. Bf likes my avi and my friends all like the fire one so....

E P O N A wrote:

Link?

Also, (((hugs)))

here you go
https://www.modelmayhem.com/po.php?thread_id=768925

Phane wrote:
Am going to say I almost did it Sunday morning.
Then a friend called

I'm glad you were saved by the bell, so to speak.  I also hoped you talked about it with people you trust, and I *especially* hope you're scheduling an appointment with competent medical people.

I've been to the end of myself, and only the fact that I had promised to call for help when things got dire saved my life.  The doctors and therapists worked a complete miracle, and for three years now I've been able to beat back the darkness.

Please believe that real help is available, and promise to call for that help if you're ever again in the same situation as you were on Sunday.  The Contract for Survival is a proven lifesaver, and all it takes is a commitment to call for help.  If you don't know who to call, 911 works.

We're here for you.  Don't hesitate to PM me or anyone else who offers.  It's not an annoyance to us - we take this utterly seriously.

Phane wrote:
Am going to say I almost did it Sunday morning.
Then a friend called

Thank goodness for friends! How are you now Phane? I can't sleep, wanna talk about it? Feel free to PM me. If you want to talk by phone just say so in the pm and i can send you my number. The important thing Phane, and damn if i didnt learn this in my own crisis, is that suicide is forever, it is eternal, and usually our problems are huge but can be worked through. People care here Phane. We dont judge. I'll be here for a while, pm me if you want. I'm concerned for you.

Tim

Lawrence Guy wrote:

I'm glad you were saved by the bell, so to speak.  I also hoped you talked about it with people you trust, and I *especially* hope you're scheduling an appointment with competent medical people.

I've been to the end of myself, and only the fact that I had promised to call for help when things got dire saved my life.  The doctors and therapists worked a complete miracle, and for three years now I've been able to beat back the darkness.

Please believe that real help is available, and promise to call for that help if you're ever again in the same situation as you were on Sunday.  The Contract for Survival is a proven lifesaver, and all it takes is a commitment to call for help.  If you don't know who to call, 911 works.

We're here for you.  Don't hesitate to PM me or anyone else who offers.  It's not an annoyance to us - we take this utterly seriously.

Am trying to change the way I think I just really hate myself
but I made plenty of phone calls since then I have just had a very hard emotional year I need to breath and let go

Tim Little Photography wrote:

Thank goodness for friends! How are you now Phane? I can't sleep, wanna talk about it? Feel free to PM me. If you want to talk by phone just say so in the pm and i can send you my number. The important thing Phane, and damn if i didnt learn this in my own crisis, is that suicide is forever, it is eternal, and usually our problems are huge but can be worked through. People care here Phane. We dont judge. I'll be here for a while, pm me if you want. I'm concerned for you.

Tim

Better then Sunday
how are you doing?
am so glad people care about people or Life would be a hard place its what makes me happy to be their for people

Phane wrote:

Am trying to change the way I think I just really hate myself
but I made plenty of phone calls since then I have just had a very hard emotional year I need to breath and let go

Breathing is good.  Talking is very good.  Sounds like you're responding well.  I promise that this is the last time I say this (I don't want to be a nag), but do see a therapist.  There's no shame in it and they can show you SO many ways to breath.

I went through a lot of self-hatred myself.  Still do, in fact, but I've learned to ignore that voice, or at least sneer at it.  Took some time, I will admit.

*hug*

Feeling shitty makes you feel pretty shitty, doesn't it?