Model
Brett Rossi
Posts: 527
Los Angeles, California, US
I just feel like i'll never be good enough for anyone anymore .... my family, my friends, my profession. Am I the only one? =[
Model
MYS Britt
Posts: 10720
San Diego, California, US
Dannielle Levan wrote:
THREAD HUGS!
Also, kitten pile.
![https://gatoisland.com/images/kittenpile.jpg]() thank you!
that's nice
cheered me u a little
Photographer
Photons 2 Pixels Images
Posts: 17011
Berwick, Pennsylvania, US
Scottiie wrote:
I just feel like i'll never be good enough for anyone anymore .... my family, my friends, my profession. Am I the only one? =[ I feel the same way and always have. It's hard to stop that feeling when time after time others do or say something that just reinforces it.
All I can say is I know I'm good enough for anyone, but that does nothing to diminish the feeling.
Bleh....I'm not doing so good at cheering anyone up so I'll stop now.  I just wish I could offer you some encouraging words. You are you. That's all you can be. Just try to be good enough for yourself.
Photographer
Star Child
Posts: 39289
Nashville, Tennessee, US
Photographer
Alexandria Georgiades
Posts: 26817
Sierra Vista, Arizona, US
Scottiie wrote:
I just feel like i'll never be good enough for anyone anymore .... my family, my friends, my profession. Am I the only one? =[ Never measure your worth through somebody else. Love you, first and foremost.
Don't let the world determine who you are...you are unique. Each one of us are "one of a kind".
Photographer
Alexandria Georgiades
Posts: 26817
Sierra Vista, Arizona, US
Photons 2 Pixels Images wrote:
Happy Halloween everyone.  Happy Samhain to you as well.
Photographer
Star Child
Posts: 39289
Nashville, Tennessee, US
Photographer
Chris Rifkin
Posts: 25581
Tampa, Florida, US
Scottiie wrote:
I just feel like i'll never be good enough for anyone anymore .... my family, my friends, my profession. Am I the only one? =[ You responded to my post,so you know what I'm feeling..
You are young yet,you have a great look.Don't let anyone get you down...
Head out to Glamourcon,hell,I'll even be out there.
Model
Jessyka Ann
Posts: 10660
Hyannis, Massachusetts, US
I cant stand that when Im feeling good about myself and I initiate sex I cant seem to turn him on...what am I doing wrong here?
I dont feel good enough...Im sitting here crying because Im not secure enough to even walk around naked in front of him.
I dont know what to do anymore.
I never feel good enough for him.
I always feel like he should be looking for another girlfriend.
I shouldn't be with anyone. I shouldnt be with anyone.
Model
Jessyka Ann
Posts: 10660
Hyannis, Massachusetts, US
my insecurities are consuming me and its tearing me apart.
Model
Jessyka Ann
Posts: 10660
Hyannis, Massachusetts, US
anyone out there??? ANYONE???
I just need someone to talk to really bad
Model
Baeli
Posts: 1016
Truro, England, United Kingdom
Julia Gold wrote:
Recently i've been gaining a lot of weight. And it's really really making me feel shitty about everything.
I look in the mirror and all I see is fat. All I see is my face getting fatter, arms getting fatter, tummy getting fatter. I hate this so fucking much. I was 100 half a year ago, then I grew to 105, now i'm fucking going up to 110 and every day that scale arrow gets closer and closer to it I wanna kill myself.
I'm even getting back into old habits because of it.
And I hate it. All I want to be is thin. Not even too thin. Just a nice 95 lbs.
Why, no matter how hard i try do I just keep gaining weight UGH
I hate food. I hate how I eat so much, and have such a sweet tooth and love food.
I'm just venting. Please don't yell at me or anything.
I really feel like cutting my fat off. And i'm really tempted.
I just want to not be this fat lard that I am. I hate having this fat face of mines.
I'd rather be bald than be this way. Than to see the scale go higher and higher.
My face getting uglier, body getting even more unattractive not even a hippo would touch me. Julia ... you are only 0.1 away from being underweight according to BMI. I am 205 lbs, 100lbs heavier than you. I have lost 30 lbs so far on my diet and I see and feel fat, because it is there and will only disappear in time. I wish it would just go, because I hate being treated like a disease. I have such a long way to go. I've had a reality check recently, in that I'm wasting my time here because in the half-year so far, no-one touching me with a barge pole wasn't a big enough hint to my big, fat skull.
I would give anything to be 110lbs. I'm sorry, but you have no idea how your post makes me feel.
Photographer
Dannielle Levan
Posts: 12865
New Westminster, British Columbia, Canada
Acanthus Art wrote:
Julia ... you are only 0.1 away from being underweight according to BMI. I am 205 lbs, 100lbs heavier than you. I have lost 30 lbs so far on my diet and I see and feel fat, because it is there and will only disappear in time. I wish it would just go, because I hate being treated like a disease. I have such a long way to go. I've had a reality check recently, in that I'm wasting my time here because in the half-year so far, no-one touching me with a barge pole wasn't a big enough hint to my big, fat skull.
I would give anything to be 110lbs. I'm sorry, but you have no idea how your post makes me feel. I'm 5'11 and 220lbs, but perfectly proportionate, my doctor said i'm a freak of nature 8D
I don't care about the comments about my size, i just sit on them...
Photographer
LeDeux Art
Posts: 50123
San Ramon, California, US
nothing wrote:
Please post phone numbers to hotlines, links to websites, and any resources you can find to help support people from being hurt by or dying from suicide or violence. Please also provide specific support groups, such as single parents, gay and lesbian, domestic abuse, sexual abuse, etc. I will consolidate them into the OP as a resource. Also feel free to provide supporting messages. your wonderful
Photographer
LeDeux Art
Posts: 50123
San Ramon, California, US
Scottiie wrote:
I just feel like i'll never be good enough for anyone anymore .... my family, my friends, my profession. Am I the only one? =[ i often struggle with feeling valued but i acept that and that helps me not stress over it. we have to love ourself
Photographer
LeDeux Art
Posts: 50123
San Ramon, California, US
my part time girlfriend is showing some jealousy towards me shooting her friends. it surprises me and helps me see how she thinks about our relationship. im not ready for a steady relationship and wonder if its avoidable.
Model
Bon voyage MM
Posts: 9508
Honolulu, Hawaii, US
Jessyka Ann wrote:
I cant stand that when Im feeling good about myself and I initiate sex I cant seem to turn him on...what am I doing wrong here?
I dont feel good enough...Im sitting here crying because Im not secure enough to even walk around naked in front of him.
I dont know what to do anymore.
I never feel good enough for him.
I always feel like he should be looking for another girlfriend.
I shouldn't be with anyone. I shouldnt be with anyone. How old is he again? 40's, right?
Sometimes, it's not always your fault. Literally. If It's too big of an issue, try suggesting a doctor's visit. A successful sex life is the responsibility of both parties.
Photographer
LeDeux Art
Posts: 50123
San Ramon, California, US
even a part time girlfriend is a big step for me, i asked her why did she want to be with me , she said, becouse of the way i made her feel when we shot together. She booked 3 shoots before i caved in and asked. Weve had a casual relationship ever since......she makes me smile with her honesty
Photographer
Photons 2 Pixels Images
Posts: 17011
Berwick, Pennsylvania, US
Jessyka Ann wrote:
anyone out there??? ANYONE???
I just need someone to talk to really bad I'm sorry, Jessyka. I haven't been around the forums much recently or I would have responded sooner.
I don't think this problem rests completely on your shoulders. Try talking to him about this. You night be surprised at what you learn.
Good luck.
Photographer
Star Child
Posts: 39289
Nashville, Tennessee, US
Photographer
Photons 2 Pixels Images
Posts: 17011
Berwick, Pennsylvania, US
Star Child wrote:
I've recently stepped out of the fog of a deep low http://kayelless.net/?p=4878 Selah? Not familiar with that term.
2 weeks ago this was me. Glad to see you coming out of it.
Peace.
Model
Natasha240
Posts: 6438
Cassina de' Pecchi, Lombardy, Italy
I don't know how much more I can take.
My dad died either Sunday or Monday. The neighbors called the cops because of the smell. They found him in his apartment. I found out yesterday. It hurts so bad, it's the whole world.
They found precancerous/early cancer cells on my cervix, I'm having surgery next month. My mouth is in constant pain, I need a third root canal. I'm in excruciating "female" pain unrelated to my cervix, and I can't afford the diagnostics to find out what is wrong.
One of my pets is near the end of his life, and will need to be euthanized soon. Two others are sick, and need attention (they are getting it, it's just pile-it-on time).
My wifes hours and pay got cut. I miss my father. Oh God, it hurts.
Photographer
photographybyStavros
Posts: 5402
Bainbridge Island, Washington, US
Scottiie wrote:
I just feel like i'll never be good enough for anyone anymore .... my family, my friends, my profession. Am I the only one? =[ You're good enough for me. You need a shoulder, a friend,whatever. come find me! I mean it!
Model
Natasa Jesic
Posts: 33
Melbourne, Victoria, Australia
This is a great thread its so beautiful and touching to see how people care from around the world when someone is hurting... its so good to also see people getting things out on here... its always so much easier to talk to a stranger so if anyone needs to talk EVER just msg me... i know exactly how it feels to have no one there, to suffer physical and mental abuse for years, to blame your self for everything thats happened and how hard it is to just get by and take each day as it comes.. you are all beautiful people remember that! peace out 
Model
Stacey Valli
Posts: 11820
Liverpool, England, United Kingdom
Natasha240 wrote:
I don't know how much more I can take.
My dad died either Sunday or Monday. The neighbors called the cops because of the smell. They found him in his apartment. I found out yesterday. It hurts so bad, it's the whole world.
They found precancerous/early cancer cells on my cervix, I'm having surgery next month. My mouth is in constant pain, I need a third root canal. I'm in excruciating "female" pain unrelated to my cervix, and I can't afford the diagnostics to find out what is wrong.
One of my pets is near the end of his life, and will need to be euthanized soon. Two others are sick, and need attention (they are getting it, it's just pile-it-on time).
My wifes hours and pay got cut. I miss my father. Oh God, it hurts.  It seems like everything is coming all at once for you. I know that this situation is horrible for you and it might seem like everything is getting on top. But know that people are there for you and that you are most definately not alone whether it be with your family, your wife or anyone on mm.
Is there no way that you cannot afford a diagnostic even through your family?
xx
Photographer
Star Child
Posts: 39289
Nashville, Tennessee, US
Natasha240 wrote:
I don't know how much more I can take.
My dad died either Sunday or Monday. The neighbors called the cops because of the smell. They found him in his apartment. I found out yesterday. It hurts so bad, it's the whole world.
They found precancerous/early cancer cells on my cervix, I'm having surgery next month. My mouth is in constant pain, I need a third root canal. I'm in excruciating "female" pain unrelated to my cervix, and I can't afford the diagnostics to find out what is wrong.
One of my pets is near the end of his life, and will need to be euthanized soon. Two others are sick, and need attention (they are getting it, it's just pile-it-on time).
My wifes hours and pay got cut. I miss my father. Oh God, it hurts. I'm starting with a prayer
Photographer
Lawrence Guy
Posts: 17716
San Diego Country Estates, California, US
Natasha240 wrote:
I don't know how much more I can take.
My dad died either Sunday or Monday. The neighbors called the cops because of the smell. They found him in his apartment. I found out yesterday. It hurts so bad, it's the whole world.
They found precancerous/early cancer cells on my cervix, I'm having surgery next month. My mouth is in constant pain, I need a third root canal. I'm in excruciating "female" pain unrelated to my cervix, and I can't afford the diagnostics to find out what is wrong.
One of my pets is near the end of his life, and will need to be euthanized soon. Two others are sick, and need attention (they are getting it, it's just pile-it-on time).
My wifes hours and pay got cut. I miss my father. Oh God, it hurts. PM sent.
Model
Natasha240
Posts: 6438
Cassina de' Pecchi, Lombardy, Italy
Natasha240 wrote:
I don't know how much more I can take.
My dad died either Sunday or Monday. The neighbors called the cops because of the smell. They found him in his apartment. I found out yesterday. It hurts so bad, it's the whole world.
They found precancerous/early cancer cells on my cervix, I'm having surgery next month. My mouth is in constant pain, I need a third root canal. I'm in excruciating "female" pain unrelated to my cervix, and I can't afford the diagnostics to find out what is wrong.
One of my pets is near the end of his life, and will need to be euthanized soon. Two others are sick, and need attention (they are getting it, it's just pile-it-on time).
My wifes hours and pay got cut. I miss my father. Oh God, it hurts. Thanks guys. As I sit here, I am in the middle of yet another personal tragedy. It is taking every last ounce of reserve I have not to become unglued. I don't know how much longer I can hold out. This cannot be happening.
Model
Natasha240
Posts: 6438
Cassina de' Pecchi, Lombardy, Italy
Natasha240 wrote:
I don't know how much more I can take.
My dad died either Sunday or Monday. The neighbors called the cops because of the smell. They found him in his apartment. I found out yesterday. It hurts so bad, it's the whole world.
They found precancerous/early cancer cells on my cervix, I'm having surgery next month. My mouth is in constant pain, I need a third root canal. I'm in excruciating "female" pain unrelated to my cervix, and I can't afford the diagnostics to find out what is wrong.
One of my pets is near the end of his life, and will need to be euthanized soon. Two others are sick, and need attention (they are getting it, it's just pile-it-on time).
My wifes hours and pay got cut. I miss my father. Oh God, it hurts. dp
Photographer
Photons 2 Pixels Images
Posts: 17011
Berwick, Pennsylvania, US
Natasha240 wrote:
dp I love you.
I don't know what else to say.
Model
Senator Awesomepants
Posts: 5800
Greenville, Indiana, US
Natasha240 wrote:
I don't know how much more I can take.
My dad died either Sunday or Monday. The neighbors called the cops because of the smell. They found him in his apartment. I found out yesterday. It hurts so bad, it's the whole world.
They found precancerous/early cancer cells on my cervix, I'm having surgery next month. My mouth is in constant pain, I need a third root canal. I'm in excruciating "female" pain unrelated to my cervix, and I can't afford the diagnostics to find out what is wrong.
One of my pets is near the end of his life, and will need to be euthanized soon. Two others are sick, and need attention (they are getting it, it's just pile-it-on time).
My wifes hours and pay got cut. I miss my father. Oh God, it hurts. *HUG* *HUG* Life's treating you rough.
Model
Little Alice
Posts: 3803
Chicago, Illinois, US
This is a wonderful thread and I wish I had joined MM and found it much much sooner. To all of those who know how it feels to have a partner reduce you to absolute nothingness, I know how you feel and you can message me anytime for someone who will listen. No one should feel unloved by the person they are with.
Model
Natasha240
Posts: 6438
Cassina de' Pecchi, Lombardy, Italy
Photons 2 Pixels Images wrote:
I love you.
I don't know what else to say. Thank you, its good enough {{hug}}
Model
Natasha240
Posts: 6438
Cassina de' Pecchi, Lombardy, Italy
Senator Awesomepants wrote:
*HUG* *HUG* Life's treating you rough. {hug back}
Photographer
Reflected
Posts: 16390
New York, New York, US
Little Alice wrote:
No one should feel unloved by the person they are with. Nor remain with them. I'm endlessly surprised that beauty, talent....a range of gifts is never protection from poor relationship choices, much less a guarantee of good ones.
*admiration*
Photographer
Dannielle Levan
Posts: 12865
New Westminster, British Columbia, Canada
Photons 2 Pixels Images wrote:
 Love your new av
i'm so exhausted, but so pumped! I got to do a fashion show last night, backstage and rehearsals as well as various other bits, it was amazing! It's pulled me up so much, i really needed it!
Model
Amanda Lentini
Posts: 173
St Louis, Saskatchewan, Canada
For some reason I'm ignored this thread...
I suffered a lot of misdiagnosis... I tried to kill myself for the first time when I was 12. From 12 to 20 there were about 15 to 18 attempts (some attempts were more of the whole let me climb over the railing and then get freaked out and climb back to safety... not every person counts those).
I was diagnosed with depression at 12. Spent 4 years in therapy before I was put on my first medication. Prozac... couldn't handle it. Zolfot was a lot better but I was taken off of that when at 18 my diagnosis was change to manic depression (Lamictal). When I tried to kill myself at 19 was added to Effexor XR which nearly killed me and I took myself off. The last attempt was with the Lamictal and at that point went back to therapy (when I was put on the Effexor my psychiatrist told me he felt therapy was worthless for my problem... he also tried to say that the fact my Effexor was causing me to bleed/bruise everywhere was a shitty reason to go off it).
Finally at 21 I was went to a psychologist at my school. They probably spent the first month just going over my history and determined I had PTSD and rape trauma syndrome (molested first at 10, molested and raped by boyfriend at 17, raped twice at 18, and basically pimped out at 20 by a guy I thought cared about me).
I still am in therapy... and not on any meds. I need to wait until I can get life insurance (Missouri doesn't insure people with history of suicide within past 5 years of medical history) and hopefully instead of being put on an anti-depressant can get a proper anti-anxiety such as Valium or Xanex.
Talking about this stuff over the internet or with just my therapist is much easier for me then in a support group. Mostly because the first (and only) support group I was in basically called me a liar because surely no person can go through all of that (especially with 2 of 3 rapes being done by people you don't know).
It caused me a lot of problems. My last boyfriend (outside of the guy I'm dating now who I honestly trust with my life) started emotionally and mentally abusive. About a month before I broke up with him (which included calling off an engagement) he started to do things like slam me into cars and buildings during fights... I knew it would get worse if I stayed with him.
Model
Amanda Lentini
Posts: 173
St Louis, Saskatchewan, Canada
Scottiie wrote:
I just feel like i'll never be good enough for anyone anymore .... my family, my friends, my profession. Am I the only one? =[ Not at all. It's taken me 11 years of therapy to realize that I am not a worthless waste of space who destroys lives including my own and is never going to be worth anything but as a cum disposal to anyone.
|
I just wish I could offer you some encouraging words. You are you. That's all you can be. Just try to be good enough for yourself.
It seems like everything is coming all at once for you. I know that this situation is horrible for you and it might seem like everything is getting on top. But know that people are there for you and that you are most definately not alone whether it be with your family, your wife or anyone on mm.