Justin wrote:
I don't like to hug. Therefore, I'm reading, I'm uptight.

See, I don't care what other people do. They can hug, kiss, handshake, grope, grind, air-kiss, lip-kiss, cheek-kiss, butt-kiss, butt-slap, high-five, boot-lick, hickey-generate - I don't care. I promise not to judge you on your preferred gesture of friendship or business acquaintanceship.

For me, it's a matter of business decorum and personal space. So I don't initiate hugs.

To my way of thinking, I'm really uptight if I'm worried about what others do. And I don't worry. But it seems that others want to place labels on me because I don't hug, or maybe if I hug in a style that's not quite right. Now, to me, that's uptight.

Precisely.

Well said.

SLE Photography wrote:
It's not gratitude,they're light headed from you leaving them hanging upside down for so long.

Melvin Moten Jr wrote:

Oh sure.  Threaten me with a good time.  (uh, I'm the yellow one & you're the blue one, right??  )

UnoMundo Photography wrote:
Melissa has issues. She still wets the bed, so dont expect emotional warmth.

I am hugging Iris before the shoot !

I assure you I do not wet the bed.  And why do I have issues because I don't expect to be hugged everytime I do a shoot?

Melissa Lynnette wrote:

I assure you I do not wet the bed.  And why do I have issues because I don't expect to be hugged everytime I do a shoot?

They're just hugging me hoping that I'll grope them!

Iris Swope wrote:

They're just hugging me hoping that I'll grope them!

Me likey grope!

Melissa Lynnette wrote:
Maybe this only happens to me, but what is up with photographers hugging me after a shoot that goes well?  My boss doesn't hug me when he lands a big important client.  My old boss never hugged me when.....oh wait, she did, but she was my aunt.  Ok, bad example.  But what I'm wondering is:  How many photographers are huggers?

Usually its the model that intiates hugs. I'm not a good person to ask. I'm friends with a lot of my models and they are usually the ones that initiate handshakes, hugs, punches in the arm, slaps on the back... etc...

If you don't want to be hugged just stick out your hand. If the photogrpaher gets upset then that's their problem. If you don't do something about it then its yours.

Mike Garland wrote:
Sorry to say i'm one of the huggers, my wife goes on the shoots with me and it is are way of saying thanks for a great shoot and a job well done.
Mike Garland

Couldn't you just buy me a NutriGrain bar?  Or get my pics to me in a timely fashion?  Not saying you wouldn't normally, but unless you are my mother, boyfriend or best friend, I'm not big on the hugging.  Maybe I should have been raised in a more touchy feely home.

studio L wrote:

and there's the rub....it ain't about you see, it's about the other person...to fail to take the other person's comfort zone into the equation is just, well, so american!

and i don't care what country you are in, or how old you are (smile)

wow that's a bizarre interpretation of my post!

my hugs are demonstration of my appreciation for and recognition of the huge gift that was given. yep its about me in that i am responsible for the success (or failure) of the shoot. if a model gave me nothing, he/she did not do their job. if he/she gave me everything, they made it hard for me to fuck it up. you bet they will get a hug from me for that, and can bet they won't be rehired if they do not.

get used to it. on the set it is ALWAYS about the photographer. there is no choice. It is his/her set, his/her responsibility, his/her client that must be satisfied, and his/her payroll that must be met.

oh well guess i'll go back to making sexual advances on my subjects. *rolls eyes and leaves the room, leaving the sticks firmly inserted between the tightly clenched cheeks.

UnoMundo Photography wrote:
Melissa has issues. She still wets the bed, ...

Hey, this thread is about hugging, not some kind of fetish!

Melissa Lynnette wrote:
Couldn't you just buy me a NutriGrain bar?  Or get my pics to me in a timely fashion?  Not saying you wouldn't normally, but unless you are my mother, boyfriend or best friend, I'm not big on the hugging.  Maybe I should have been raised in a more touchy feely home.

For you Melissa, this rap song seems to capure your feelings to a degree...lol:

Aceyalone "Five Feet"

One Two, One Two
You got the levels straight?
lets do my thing
Talking shit while he was rollin' his weed
my niger hit him in the face
he didn't know that disrespect
would lead to such a serious case.
if you knew how to read the situation
you would stay your his place.
if there is one thing that everyone one needs
is their god damn space
let me talk about it as I rock it

Give me five feet,
all around the world,
I don't want no body touching me unless it's my girls
I give a pound of hugs of love some are like that
don't be tapping my shoulders
or patting me on the back
or pullin' my arm
checkin my size
I'm liable to do you harm,
my temple is my prize
I'm wise and on the really
I ain't too touchy feely
if you put your hands up on me,
I might just smack you silly
there a billion people
touch somebody else, touch yourself
I'll be sure to get at you if I need your help
but until then, maybe when I'm dead, or still
but to touch you without touchin' you is one of my gifts

talking shit while she was drunk at the bar,
my homey slapped her in the face
she didn't know that disrespect
would lead to such a serious case
if she knew how to read the situation
she would stay in her place
if it's one thing that everyone needs is their god damn space

why you all up up under me,
screamin in my ear
why you tryin to talk over the music
when you know we barely can hear
why you tuggin on my coat tail
grabbin on my sleeve
yo cover your mouth when you cough around me
don't touch me when you sneeze
I don't like disease,
I don't want to give you what I've got
yo hit the weed,
but what I don't need is someone always in my spot
stadin when I'm standing,
breathin down my neck
yo have some respect
I guess you think that water ain't wet
just back the back the fuck up,
no I ain't stuck up
I just don't want to hear your moans and groans
and hick-ups and stuff
being recorded with the tape recorders all in my grill
but touchin you without touchin you is one of my skills

talkin shit while he was up at the mic.
somebody hit him in the face
he didn't know that disrespect
would lead to such a serious case
if he knew how to read the situation
he would stay in his place
if there is one thing that everyone needs
is there goddamn space
let me talk about it as I rock it


now I'm a draw the lines on the ground and show you my squares
at least arms distance so stand over there
hey love you know I miss you
and how we embrace,
but I let you know if I wanna kiss you
or see how you taste
yo we all got issues we need to face,
so don't think I'm tryin' to diss you
when I tell you the case
in case you wondering it's just like that
I practice telepathy
I already know what you're goona say
before you step to me
I hate crowded elevators and downtown brush,
pack trains, crazy-ass people on the bus,
sometimes roll blush,
lookin' so called crush,
but I'd rather teleport through space so ya'll can bite my dust
use body language baby,
I can dig that,
but homey you need to kick back and relax on the act
the bottom line is don't invade no body's own
or maybe your own, sincerely aceyalone

talking shit while he was walking the street,
somebody shot him in the face
he didn't know that disrespect
would lead to such a serious case,
if you knew how to read the situation
you would stay in your place
if there is one thing that every one needs
is their goddamn space

give me five feet all around the world
to each his own

studio L wrote:
And from your premise's logical extension-from now on I am going to have 3 children with every model I shoot, and their mother's as well.

Spread the love baby....

dude you are scaring me. will you not hug your child for fear of impregnating them? talk about uptight!

Melissa Lynnette wrote:
Couldn't you just buy me a NutriGrain bar?  Or get my pics to me in a timely fashion?  Not saying you wouldn't normally, but unless you are my mother, boyfriend or best friend, I'm not big on the hugging.  Maybe I should have been raised in a more touchy feely home.

Is that like a TFNGB?

No harm in the way you were raised or your preferences about being hugged or not. Just be quick on the draw and stick your hand out for a handshake after a shoot. Hopefully the photogs will get the message.

You could always throw in the casual comment towards the end of the shoot that you're almost out of the contagious phase of some hard to pronounce virus that is only passed by touching that causes impotence and baldness in men.

Adrienne Aurora wrote:
You need to worry when they want a naked hug.
(model being naked for the smart asses)

Worse yet when the photographer wants to be naked too! Or instead.

Mickle Design Werks wrote:

For you Melissa, this rap song seems to capure your feelings to a degree...lol:

Aceyalone "Five Feet"

One Two, One Two
You got the levels straight?
lets do my thing
Talking shit while he was rollin' his weed
my niger hit him in the face
he didn't know that disrespect
would lead to such a serious case.
if you knew how to read the situation
you would stay your his place.
if there is one thing that everyone one needs
is their god damn space
let me talk about it as I rock it

Give me five feet,
all around the world,
I don't want no body touching me unless it's my girls
I give a pound of hugs of love some are like that
don't be tapping my shoulders
or patting me on the back
or pullin' my arm
checkin my size
I'm liable to do you harm,
my temple is my prize
I'm wise and on the really
I ain't too touchy feely
if you put your hands up on me,
I might just smack you silly
there a billion people
touch somebody else, touch yourself
I'll be sure to get at you if I need your help
but until then, maybe when I'm dead, or still
but to touch you without touchin' you is one of my gifts

talking shit while she was drunk at the bar,
my homey slapped her in the face
she didn't know that disrespect
would lead to such a serious case
if she knew how to read the situation
she would stay in her place
if it's one thing that everyone needs is their god damn space

why you all up up under me,
screamin in my ear
why you tryin to talk over the music
when you know we barely can hear
why you tuggin on my coat tail
grabbin on my sleeve
yo cover your mouth when you cough around me
don't touch me when you sneeze
I don't like disease,
I don't want to give you what I've got
yo hit the weed,
but what I don't need is someone always in my spot
stadin when I'm standing,
breathin down my neck
yo have some respect
I guess you think that water ain't wet
just back the back the fuck up,
no I ain't stuck up
I just don't want to hear your moans and groans
and hick-ups and stuff
being recorded with the tape recorders all in my grill
but touchin you without touchin you is one of my skills

talkin shit while he was up at the mic.
somebody hit him in the face
he didn't know that disrespect
would lead to such a serious case
if he knew how to read the situation
he would stay in his place
if there is one thing that everyone needs
is there goddamn space
let me talk about it as I rock it


now I'm a draw the lines on the ground and show you my squares
at least arms distance so stand over there
hey love you know I miss you
and how we embrace,
but I let you know if I wanna kiss you
or see how you taste
yo we all got issues we need to face,
so don't think I'm tryin' to diss you
when I tell you the case
in case you wondering it's just like that
I practice telepathy
I already know what you're goona say
before you step to me
I hate crowded elevators and downtown brush,
pack trains, crazy-ass people on the bus,
sometimes roll blush,
lookin' so called crush,
but I'd rather teleport through space so ya'll can bite my dust
use body language baby,
I can dig that,
but homey you need to kick back and relax on the act
the bottom line is don't invade no body's own
or maybe your own, sincerely aceyalone

talking shit while he was walking the street,
somebody shot him in the face
he didn't know that disrespect
would lead to such a serious case,
if you knew how to read the situation
you would stay in your place
if there is one thing that every one needs
is their goddamn space

give me five feet all around the world
to each his own

LOL.  But seriously, I think this thread got out of hand.  I'm not anti hug.  I just keep getting caught off guard and was curious about how common this was.  I didn't think it was anything perverted.  I'm not uptight because I don't want every photographer I shoot with wrapping his arms around me because he's glad he did his job right.  Appreciation is best shown with cash.......or healthy snack bars. 

tripstar wrote:

Is that like a TFNGB?

No harm in the way you were raised or your preferences about being hugged or not. Just be quick on the draw and stick your hand out for a handshake after a shoot. Hopefully the photogs will get the message.

You could always throw in the casual comment towards the end of the shoot that you're almost out of the contagious phase of some hard to pronounce virus that is only passed by touching that causes impotence and baldness in men.

I'll keep that in mind.    Cough a bit and stick out hand.  Should I cough in my hand first?

Melissa Lynnette wrote:
Couldn't you just buy me a NutriGrain bar?  Or get my pics to me in a timely fashion?  Not saying you wouldn't normally, but unless you are my mother, boyfriend or best friend, I'm not big on the hugging.  Maybe I should have been raised in a more touchy feely home.

Melissa - I don't have a NutriGrain bar, but I have something for you.....






Look what you got started!!

Curt Burgess wrote:

Melissa - I don't have a NutriGrain bar, but I have something for you.....






Look what you got started!!

Oh Curt!  You know you're the only photographer I'd ever like to hug!

oldguysrule wrote:

wow that's a bizarre interpretation of my post!

my hugs are demonstration of my appreciation for and recognition of the huge gift that was given. yep its about me in that i am responsible for the success (or failure) of the shoot. if a model gave me nothing, he/she did not do their job. if he/she gave me everything, they made it hard for me to fuck it up. you bet they will get a hug from me for that, and can bet they won't be rehired if they do not.

get used to it. on the set it is ALWAYS about the photographer. there is no choice. It is his/her set, his/her responsibility, his/her client that must be satisfied, and his/her payroll that must be met.

oh well guess i'll go back to making sexual advances on my subjects. *rolls eyes and leaves the room, leaving the sticks firmly inserted between the tightly clenched cheeks.

bizarre indeed sir old cheeks.

me "get used to it"?

ha!

you'll "just have to get used to" (arrogant myopic stupidity added for graphic sarcastic emphasis only btw) the fact that not everyone wants YOU in their personal space-regardless of whether it's 'your world' or not king jimmy sir.

it's always about the photographer indeed!

ewwwwwwww, the arrogance of THAT is sticking to my shoe.

(no wonder you live out of a suitcase, hee hee)

well we can agree to disagree-you won't be hugging me anytime soon old man, and thank heavens for that small favor.

you really want to show someone your sincere appreciation and have them understand it unequivocally? (rhetorical question of the day)

try doing it in a way that THEY feel comfortable with.

that is human r-e-s-p-e-c-t.

you ought to be old enough to know what that is.

and what it really means.

the sun just does not revolve around you, no matter the size of your king jimmy photographer's ego, 'neh?

oldguysrule wrote:

dude you are scaring me. will you not hug your child for fear of impregnating them? talk about uptight!

gee, you are the master of off topic reification aren't you.

Melissa Lynnette wrote:
To oldguysrule and studio L:

Boys, boys, put those things away.  You'll poke somebody's eye out.  Whoa nelly!!

sniff, ok mom...BUT HE STARTED IT! (smile)

Just Shoot Me Photograp wrote:

That would be a cool t-shirt.

Tina G.
What about stylists?