Star Child wrote:

^^^
This is why I love and support this thread so much.

There are times when I wish the title was a little more indicative of what's found here, but as it is when folks do venture in they find others who are dealing with similar issues and can relate and even provide additional informative help.

I meant to come back and say thank you cuz I've ended up finding some useful websites through that.

Barbara DivaEroticus wrote:

Julia, I have asked those same questions.  There are a lot of answers here:  http://bpdfamily.com/index.html

Your situation is so similar to what I've gone through.  :hugs:

Thanks!

BrunetteGrenade wrote:
I have an anxiety disorder

This is a great website that I thought I would share. There are many videos with people's experiences dealing with depression, stress, anxiety, eating disorders, bipolar disorder, cutting, alcohol and drugs, and suicide.

There's feel better tips, how to help a friend, numbers you can call, and a lot more helpful information.

http://www.halfofus.com/

This is a great site, thanks for the link. I have Post Traumatic Stress Disorder with severe chronic depression and anxiety. This has some very helpful information.

Barbara DivaEroticus wrote:
Some of you may have read my post in SF2, but if not...we (The Rachel and I) left.  Moved out.  Not dealing with that anymore.  His post-new year "fuck you" was the last one he'll ever say to me.

Oh Thank God! I have worried so much about you Barbara. I lived with a Borderline too. Don't let him lay guilt on you, they are masters of that. You have to take care of Rachel and yourself. Anyone who stands in the way of that is harmful. I'm really proud of you for taking control back. It's hard, I know. Rest well knowing that you have made the right choice. I am of the opinion that someone with BPD is incapable of really loving someone in the way the rest of us knows it. We have to hurt for them to see how much we care for them. They think "Wow, look how much she is crying, she must really love me to cry that much." He has an illness that you cannot fix. You are actually helping him by moving out. Maybe it will be a wake up call that he has problems. But all that matters is you and Rachel. We are all here for you! Please keep us up to date.

Stay well my friend!
Tim

Tim Little Photography wrote:

Oh Thank God! I have worried so much about you Barbara. I lived with a Borderline too. Don't let him lay guilt on you, they are masters of that. You have to take care of Rachel and yourself. Anyone who stands in the way of that is harmful. I'm really proud of you for taking control back. It's hard, I know. Rest well knowing that you have made the right choice. I am of the opinion that someone with BPD is incapable of really loving someone in the way the rest of us knows it. We have to hurt for them to see how much we care for them. They think "Wow, look how much she is crying, she must really love me to cry that much." He has an illness that you cannot fix. You are actually helping him by moving out. Maybe it will be a wake up call that he has problems. But all that matters is you and Rachel. We are all here for you! Please keep us up to date.

Stay well my friend!
Tim

Do people truly enjoy seeing other people cry?

Jules NYC wrote:

Do people truly enjoy seeing other people cry?

My ex, who has been diagnosed as having BPD has said that she can only tell if a person loves her if she does something that hurts that person and then see how bad it makes them feel. It's one of the reasons they become abusive and then change into the most loving person ever. In the book "I hate you...Please don't leave!!" it suggest there was something lacking in their childhood that causes an inability to process the feelings of love like most people.

Tim Little Photography wrote:

My ex, who has been diagnosed as having BPD has said that she can only tell if a person loves her if she does something that hurts that person and then see how bad it makes them feel. It's one of the reasons they become abusive and then change into the most loving person ever. In the book "I hate you...Please don't leave!!" it suggest there was something lacking in their childhood that causes an inability to process the feelings of love like most people.

I'm glad I visited this thread.
*Seeing the light*

Now I'm beginning to understand why a person who never really cries (me) turned on the waterworks so profusely on New Years Day.

I saw a picture in the 2am thread of you.  You have kind eyes.
I hope a woman comes into your life that appreciates & loves you if you don't have one already Tim.

Jules NYC wrote:

I'm glad I visited this thread.
*Seeing the light*

Now I'm beginning to understand why a person who never really cries (me) turned on the waterworks so profusely on New Years Day.

I saw a picture in the 2am thread of you.  You have kind eyes.
I hope a woman comes into your life that appreciates & loves you if you don't have one already Tim.

You are so kind Jules. You have the heart of an angel. It was 15 years ago that we broke up and I haven't dated since. A lot of that is my poor self-image. I have 3rd degree burn scars all over my body and I have PTSD. I have so much baggage to dump on a kind person. But, I am working on it. My goal for the year is to get out, to meet some people and to see what happens. Thank you Jules!

Tim Little Photography wrote:
You are so kind Jules. You have the heart of an angel. It was 15 years ago that we broke up and I haven't dated since. A lot of that is my poor self-image. I have 3rd degree burn scars all over my body and I have PTSD. I have so much baggage to dump on a kind person. But, I am working on it. My goal for the year is to get out, to meet some people and to see what happens. Thank you Jules!

Oh Tim, that was so beautiful to say.
Thank you.
No one speaks to me like that.

I have read your words about who you are and what you deal with.  The burn scars are just scars.  PTSD is very serious but with the right therapist, a loving woman would help you through.

I sincerely believe it's not 'dumping' when two people are genuinely interested in a loving relationship.  I think it's ultimate love to be concerned over someone's welfare more than your own... even you, protecting the emotional health of someone you haven't even met yet.

How altruistic.
You are.


This song made me think of you ~
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=W0YxjH09TDU

Did someone's heart break
Or did someone do somebody wrong?
So if you find someone
Someone to have, someone to hold
Don't trade it for silver
Don't trade it for gold
I have all of life's treasures
And they are fine and they are good
They remind me that houses
Are just made of wood
What makes a house grand
Ain't the roof or the doors
If there's love in a house
It's a palace for sure
Without love...
It ain't nothin but a house
A house where nobody lives

Jules NYC wrote:

Oh Tim, that was so beautiful to say.
Thank you.
No one speaks to me like that.

I have read your words about who you are and what you deal with.  The burn scars are just scars.  PTSD is very serious but with the right therapist, a loving woman would help you through.

I sincerely believe it's not 'dumping' when two people are genuinely interested in a loving relationship.  I think it's ultimate love to be concerned over someone's welfare more than your own... even you, protecting the emotional health of someone you haven't even met yet.

How altruistic.
You are.


This song made me think of you ~
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=W0YxjH09TDU

Did someone's heart break
Or did someone do someone wrong?
So if you find someone
Someone to have, someone to hold
Don't trade it for silver
Don't trade it for gold
I have all of life's treasures
And they are fine and they are good
They remind me that houses
Are just made of wood
What makes a house grand
Ain't the roof or the doors
If there's love in a house
It's a palace for sure
Without love...
It ain't nothin but a house
A house where nobody lives

Thank you Jules, no one ever speaks to me like that either! I have a big smile on my face and a few tears in some very grateful eyes!

Tim Little Photography wrote:

Thank you Jules, no one ever speaks to me like that either! I have a big smile on my face and a few tears in some very grateful eyes!

Big Smile

Star Child wrote:
morning with coffee

coffee and chai tea-which is ok-but i tried something new and oatmeal and snack cakes.



(I'm not hungry but my head keeps telling me to eat)

Faith EnFire wrote:

coffee and chai tea-which is ok-but i tried something new and oatmeal and snack cakes.



(I'm not hungry but my head keeps telling me to eat)

Yeah, I need to do more than just coffee.

Faith EnFire wrote:
morning all

good to see Tim held it down while i puttered on my day off

I nominate Tim mayor of the thread

Oh gee, Thank YOU Faith! But If I were mayor I would just raise taxes and wind up in some torrid scandal involving an intern and political corruption. I say we elect you Mayor and let me live my dream and be Sargent At Arms! Yea, big ol' Sargent type arms! Yea boy!

Faith EnFire wrote:
I'm having a low day. Car broke. female issues. Ulcers. Just can't process it all. But this will ask pass. Just have to power thru today

You will make it

Star Child wrote:

You will make it

I made it!

tummy still hurts and dog is still in pain but is doing a little better. i really hope we don't have to get xrays for him

Faith EnFire wrote:
sorry, Tim. got no advice for that. I usually push myself too hard soo

Something to ponder that i just learned about last night; Megabus will be opening up a new route in the spring that will connect Nashville to Milwaukee. Hmmmmm.

Jak is bored and wants me to get off the computer and play with him.

Star Child wrote:

Something to ponder that i just learned about last night; Megabus will be opening up a new route in the spring that will connect Nashville to Milwaukee. Hmmmmm.

Jak is bored and wants me to get off the computer and play with him.

hmmm

Faith EnFire wrote:
dog watching the aquarium. the tramadol they have him on makes him really tired and a little loopy
but we are both doing a little better

I hope you are both doing lots better real soon!

Faith EnFire wrote:
dog watching the aquarium. the tramadol they have him on makes him really tired and a little loopy
but we are both doing a little better

Squeekerz wrote:
I was nearly triggered there for a moment when I started reading the comments on people with BPD.   I actually am diagnosed Borderline, so I irrationally take things personally when BPD sufferers as a whole are targeted in a generalized statement.  I was very happy and relieved to see that none of that happened. :]

BPD sucks... I hate it...


As for this thread, I am so happy it is here.