Photographer
Jay Bowman
Posts: 6511
Los Angeles, California, US
Okay, I'll admit it.
When I began doing photography 2 and a half years ago, there was one thing I said I would not shoot under any circumstances. A guy has to retain his dignity, you know. I felt like there are some things that truly are beneathe me and I need not whore myself out simply for a paycheck.
But... because I'm greedy and have a flexible code of ethics I did the one thing I said I'd never do.
Yes, last weekend I shot a wedding.
Damn!! I felt so dirty! Not to mention it was a disaster and I should've charged far more. But nothing could compare to that filthy feeling I had knowing that I did something I hated to do for money.
So there's my story. I feel better now...
Photographer
La Seine by the Hudson
Posts: 8587
New York, New York, US
Oh, don't worry. I've done it too. It's been years. Like 10 years ago. It wasn't for money, either, rather a favor for a family friend. Horrible experience. Out of some 300+ guests, I was the only person who didn't get a thing to eat.
Seriously.
Photographer
UnoMundo
Posts: 47532
Olympia, Washington, US
Jay Bowman wrote:
Okay, I'll admit it.
When I began doing photography 2 and a half years ago, there was one thing I said I would not shoot under any circumstances. I guy has to retain his dignity, you know. I felt like there are some things that truly are beneathe me and I need not whore myself out simply for a paycheck.
But... because I'm greedy and have a flexible code of ethics I did the one thing I said I'd never do.
Yes, last weekend I shot a wedding.
Damn!! I felt so dirty! Not to mention it was a disaster and I should've charged far more. But nothing could compare to the dirty feeling I had knowing that I did something I hated to do for money.
So there's my story. I feel better now... wait until a guy with gold teeth asks you to photograph his "employees"
they pay cash ! dilemna ?
Photographer
Dee
Posts: 3004
Toledo, Ohio, US
I too am going against my ethics for money... Not shooting a wedding but something way worse....and the messed up thing is I cant tell anyone I am doing it... 
Photographer
lll
Posts: 12295
Seattle, Washington, US
Shot two weddings this year, really didn't want to do it, but when good friends asked... *sigh*
*puke*
Photographer
Jay Bowman
Posts: 6511
Los Angeles, California, US
UnoMundo Photography wrote:
wait until a guy with gold teeth asks you to photograph his "employees"
they pay cash ! dilemna ? P'leez. Be happy to shoot that. No dilemma, no hesitation whatsoever.
Model
little apple blossom
Posts: 7617
MCMINNVILLE, Oregon, US
I don't think it's so bad for friends it just shows that you love them more than your art to do that for them and that's not a bad thing, but loving money more...
I can't talk. I paint and do commisioned paintings for people all the time as well as sell my art. I just think of them seperately. There are still things I won't do but I don't consider my commisioned work art either. It's a creative interpretation of what the client wants.
Photographer
studio36uk
Posts: 22898
Tavai, Sigave, Wallis and Futuna
Jay Bowman wrote:
Okay, I'll admit it.
But... because I'm greedy and have a flexible code of ethics I did the one thing I said I'd never do.
Yes, last weekend I shot a wedding.
Damn!! I felt so dirty! Not to mention it was a disaster and I should've charged far more. But nothing could compare to the dirty feeling I had knowing that I did something I hated to do for money.
So there's my story. I feel better now... OMG Jay... you are going to go straight to hell for that.
Studio36 
Photographer
Jay Bowman
Posts: 6511
Los Angeles, California, US
Marko Cecic-Karuzic wrote:
Oh, don't worry. I've done it too. It's been years. Like 10 years ago. It wasn't for money, either, rather a favor for a family friend. Horrible experience. Out of some 300+ guests, I was the only person who didn't get a thing to eat.
Seriously. Yeah, I can totally relate. I didn't get anything to eat there either.
Ironically, that was by choice. The food just didn't look appealing at all...
studio36uk wrote:
OMG Jay... you are going to go straight to hell for that.
Studio36 Damn!! I knew this would happen...
Photographer
Satan Bug
Posts: 127
Hell, Nord-Trøndelag, Norway
Or is it doing what you love to do to make money that really makes you hate it?
Photographer
UnoMundo
Posts: 47532
Olympia, Washington, US
Dee wrote:
I too am going against my ethics for money... Not shooting a wedding but something way worse....and the messed up thing is I cant tell anyone I am doing it... dont get the lubricants on your lens !
Photographer
59899
Posts: 477
New York, New York, US
Satan Bug wrote:
Or is it doing what you love to do to make money that really makes you hate it? lol, no i think its just that the hair and make-up artists are always so bad, and they dont allow wind machines in the church 
Photographer
D. Brian Nelson
Posts: 5477
Rapid City, South Dakota, US
Did it as favors three times. All horrible. That wedding photography takes talent, experience and motivation, and I lack all three.
No money either.
-Don
Photographer
FKVPhotography
Posts: 30064
Ocala, Florida, US
Why does everyone make wedding sound like a disease. I shot weddings for over twenty years and made a very good living at it.
I admit it's not the easiest work. You're on your feet all day, dealing with high strung brides, mothers, drunk relatives, poor food and worse. But it does teach you to think fast, move fast and get creative in a very short amount of time.
I no longer do weddings but that's because I'm 59 and weddings are pretty much a young guys thing. Can't deal with the stress anymore. I've been asked to shoot on occasion for friends which I have done and it was still fun for me.
I realize the weddings are not "high fashion" but then again how many of you are making a living shooting fashion? You can make a living shooting weddings.
There are a lot of areas in photography that may not be glamours or exciting but still pay damn well. These days I'm shooting architechture. Pretty basic stuff. But today I made $250 for about and hours work. I could have made 700-800 if I wanted to work all day but I didn't. It's called semi-retirment and I don't feel that mad rush for big bucks. So I shoot when I like. Make enough to keep under the IRS radar and everyone is happy.
So when someone mentions weddings....please it's not a disease....it's a profession....
Photographer
Ken Rieves Photography
Posts: 934
Avon Lake, Ohio, US
When someone asks what kind of photographs I take, my standard response is anything but weddings and porn. That said, I have shot weddings (but no porn) but don't enjoy doing it. For the record, I am not speaking negatively about wedding photographers. I think it takes a unique skill set to be good at wedding photography. I have seen some wedding work that is absolutely amazing on many different levels. It's just that, at this stage of my career, weddings are not for me.
Photographer
Robert Winn Photography
Posts: 2097
Virginia Beach, Virginia, US
I have done a total of about 15 wedding in my life. Hated every one of them. Not enough Rolaids on the planet to get the "What am I going to do if I screw this up, Call 300 friends and family back for a reshoot?" knot out of my stomach.
Edit: There was one wedding that I did that was fun and non stressful. At least from my perspective. It was a Wiccan Handfasting... (pagan wedding) and it was performed "skyclad" aka... nude. Everyone... not just the happy couple but all in attendance. (about 75 people in all.) Have to admit, not often you have 30 or 40 naked people dancing around a bonfire under a full moon at the reception.
Photographer
Vance C McDaniel
Posts: 7609
Los Angeles, California, US
DUDE..take a shower and cash the check..I hate weddings....Just cant do em..Too much drama..I am glad you survived!
Photographer
oldguysrule
Posts: 6129
survival instinct supercedes prideful ethics definitions.
squalor and malnutrition are vastly over-rated as character builders... far more romantic in novels and film than in reality.
plus... the images you provided your wedding client are more valuable to them than almost any other work you do will be to their clients/purchasers/audience. you could do many worse things than provide a permanent memory of a significant event in a family's life.
relax, and buy some groceries.
Photographer
Brian Diaz
Posts: 65617
Danbury, Connecticut, US
Marko Cecic-Karuzic wrote:
Oh, don't worry. I've done it too. It's been years. Like 10 years ago. It wasn't for money, either, rather a favor for a family friend. Horrible experience. Out of some 300+ guests, I was the only person who didn't get a thing to eat.
Seriously. Somehow I've never eaten when I've shot a wedding. On the other hand, I always seem to spend a significant amount of energy convincing the bridesmaids that I don't need another drink...
Photographer
Vance C McDaniel
Posts: 7609
Los Angeles, California, US
oldguysrule wrote:
survival instinct supercedes prideful ethics definitions.
squalor and malnutrition are vastly over-rated as character builders... far more romantic in novels and film than in reality.
plus... the images you provided your wedding client are more valuable to them than almost any other work you do will be to their clients/purchasers/audience. you could do many worse things than provide a permanent memory of a significant event in a family's life.
relax, and buy some groceries. YOu are so smooth....You shold be a polititian...Hmmm, a woodchipper in the White HOuse...Now that's what I'm talkin about!
Photographer
oldguysrule
Posts: 6129
Vance wrote:
Hmmm, a woodchipper in the White HOuse...Now that's what I'm talkin about! bullshit clogs a chipper. politicians are best disposed of in the Jersey swamps, buried with a few bags of lye.
Photographer
studio36uk
Posts: 22898
Tavai, Sigave, Wallis and Futuna
Ken Rieves Photography wrote:
When someone asks what kind of photographs I take, my standard response is anything but weddings and porn. I don't do weddings.... but shooting the honeymoon might be interesting.
Studio36
Photographer
FKVPhotography
Posts: 30064
Ocala, Florida, US
Winn Photographics wrote:
I have done a total of about 15 wedding in my life. Hated every one of them. Not enough Rolaids on the planet to get the "What am I going to do if I screw this up, Call 300 friends and family back for a reshoot?" knot out of my stomach. I can tell from years of experience....that thought is ALWAYS on your mind.
Just a couple wedding horror stories to lighten the mood.....
A friend of mind used a Hassie for wedding work. Apparently the film backs don't lock the shutter as with the Bronica I used. No film, shutter locks. Apparently he relied on the word of his assitant that all the backs were loaded. They were not!
He had 8 backs. I think on the Hassie in 120 format that's 8 or 10 exposures. Not sure since I never used one. But even at the 10 exp. level he missed all the church formals and most of the ceremony. Formals can be re-staged.....ceremonies are another thing all together. Try telling the bride and her mother that one!!!
I shot a wedding in Atlantic City. The groom and his 6 groomsman took him to NYC the night before the freaking wedding. The groom had been off the wagon for something like 12 years but everyone thought it was a good idea to get him plastered for his last night as a "free" man.
So here we are at the church....no groom, no groomsman.....things began to get ugly when they all run in.....still drunk!.....ok....they go ahead with the ceremony and during the part where the bride and groom face each other.....the groom starts to wobble, slurring his speech and finally in one big burp....HE PUKES ALL OVER THE BRIDE!!!!....Oh Man!....to make it worse the groomsman see him pukeing and they all run out the side door of the church and start heaving their guts up....
The bride is going absolutely fucking crazy.....yelling at the top of her voice....I HOPE YOU FUCKING DIE YOU ASSHOLE!...puke is dripping all over her....the priest is so stunned he can't even move.....the guests....half are crying....half are laughing....I'm standing there in the middle of all of this just shaking my head.
Thankfully I always get paid BEFORE the wedding not after. But would you believe they went ahead and got married anyway.....after the puke was cleaned up the best they could of the bride....what a circus!
One more.....another Atlantic City wedding....the bride was Italian....the groom was Jewish....so they held the ceremony at one of the most expensive places just outside of AC....The Blackhorse Inn......place is or at least was beautiful....the kind of place where the servers wear tuxedos and white gloves.....
Anway each set of guest sat behind the respective couple.....Italians on one side....Jewish on the other.....all they did during the combined ceremoney was glare daggers at each other......the hostility was so think you could cut it with a knife.....ceremony goes off fine.....everyone goes inside to a very expensive and elegant reception.....about an hour goes by and all of sudden I hear from the back.....YOU FUCKING WOPS!.....then I hear.....FUCK YOU JEWBOY! Next thing I see are chairs flying.....guests all jumping into the fray....fists, legs, teeth......and this is in a place where governors dine...LOL
Ended up with the police arresting about 60 people.....bride and groom however lived happily ever after.
Photographer
byReno
Posts: 1034
Arlington Heights, Illinois, US
FKVPhotoGraphics wrote:
The bride is going absolutely fucking crazy.....yelling at the top of her voice....I HOPE YOU FUCKING DIE YOU ASSHOLE!...puke is dripping all over her....the priest is so stunned he can't even move.....the guests....half are crying....half are laughing....I'm standing there in the middle of all of this just shaking my head. LMAO!
Photographer
Jay Bowman
Posts: 6511
Los Angeles, California, US
FKVPhotoGraphics wrote:
One more.....another Atlantic City wedding....the bride was Italian....the groom was Jewish....so they held the ceremony at one of the most expensive places just outside of AC....The Blackhorse Inn......place is or at least was beautiful....the kind of place where the servers wear tuxedos and white gloves.....
Anway each set of guest sat behind the respective couple.....Italians on one side....Jewish on the other.....all they did during the combined ceremoney was glare daggers at each other......the hostility was so think you could cut it with a knife.....ceremony goes off fine.....everyone goes inside to a very expensive and elegant reception.....about an hour goes by and all of sudden I hear from the back.....YOU FUCKING WOPS!.....then I hear.....FUCK YOU JEWBOY! Next thing I see are chairs flying.....guests all jumping into the fray....fists, legs, teeth......and this is in a place where governors dine...LOL
Ended up with the police arresting about 60 people.....bride and groom however lived happily ever after. Now that's a wedding I'd love to shoot...
Photographer
StevesPhotography
Posts: 208
Mustang, Oklahoma, US
I like the wedding biz. I was a Wedding reception DJ for 10 years and am planning on getting into wedding photography now.
Yes, it is a hectic and crazy scene and I can imagine quite the misery if you dont have the personality for it but I find the wedding biz to be fun and challenging.
And, as you can see above, the wedding biz gives you such stories. I have many like that myself!
Photographer
Jay Bowman
Posts: 6511
Los Angeles, California, US
StevesPhotography wrote:
Yes, it is a hectic and crazy scene and I can imagine quite the misery if you dont have the personality for it but I find the wedding biz to be fun and challenging. This is it exactly. Just doesn't line up with the way I do photography (I prefer environments where I have more control).
Nothing against people who do it and do it well. Just not for me.
Photographer
tcphotography
Posts: 116
Chicago, Illinois, US
dude, don't worry about it...take the money...just set a high price, if they bite, go for it, if not, enjoy your saturday...what's unethical about doing some nice pictures for people, in the digital age, where's the stress anyway? besides, after a few drinks, hop on the dance floor and shoot and move, it's pretty fun, make the most of it...one more thing a stressed bride is no worse than a stressed art director or client, the same line of bullsh*t mellows both just the same.
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