Photographer
Lars KC
Posts: 154
Kansas City, Missouri, US
I suspect you already knew the answer before you posted your question. Trust your feelings and you'll never make a wrong move. Good luck to you.
Photographer
Hugh Jorgen
Posts: 2850
Ashland, Oregon, US
Posted by Patrick Walberg:
Relationships are tough enough without an over dose of jealousy! It takes WORK and TIME to make a relationship pleasurable and good!
I admire one couple I work with greatly. It is Kelda and her boyfriend Kavio. They work as a team, and even though they do have their heated discussions ... but it's positive for them. A couple like that is like a team that makes themselves one. I value them so much as friends because I learn some of what it takes to "work" a relationship in either the photo or music business just by being around them.
If one person is being manipulative of the other, it is NOT an equal relationship. Eventually the manipulated one finds it is no longer pleasurable being a doormat. So are bieng a model and photographer so it double tough!!
Dont make it even tougher!!
Makeup Artist
Reese
Posts: 1136
Newport News, Virginia, US
Hypothetical:
Person one in relationship wants to model. Person one will leave person two if person two does not support the modeling endeavor... or visa versa. There seems to be no compromise. Should person one sacrifice person one's hopes to be a model to satisfy person two, the love of person one's life?
The question now is how strong is either's love? If there is no sacrifice on one or the other's side, the relationship is doomed. Who must sacrifice? Who makes that call?
And who are we to sit and judge and say, "leave your significant other," when we the outside have no idea what the relationship is based or founded on...
Does love conqure all or does modeling do it? If love is not more important than modeling, then tis a sad day...
Photographer
XtremeArtists
Posts: 9122
Posted by Reese:
Hypothetical:
Person one in relationship wants to model. Person one will leave person two if person two does not support the modeling endeavor... or visa versa. There seems to be no compromise. Should person one sacrifice person one's hopes to be a model to satisfy person two, the love of person one's life?
The question now is how strong is either's love? If there is no sacrifice on one or the other's side, the relationship is doomed. Who must sacrifice? Who makes that call?
And who are we to sit and judge and say, "leave your significant other," when we the outside have no idea what the relationship is based or founded on...
More than 50% of marriages end in divorce, but I'm quite sure less than 50% of aspiring models "make it." For a change, the odds favor a serious relationship.
You really should just choose your passion: your partner or your career. Which are you more passionate about?
Makeup Artist
Reese
Posts: 1136
Newport News, Virginia, US
Posted by XtremeArtists ?:
Posted by Reese:
Hypothetical:
Person one in relationship wants to model. Person one will leave person two if person two does not support the modeling endeavor... or visa versa. There seems to be no compromise. Should person one sacrifice person one's hopes to be a model to satisfy person two, the love of person one's life?
The question now is how strong is either's love? If there is no sacrifice on one or the other's side, the relationship is doomed. Who must sacrifice? Who makes that call?
And who are we to sit and judge and say, "leave your significant other," when we the outside have no idea what the relationship is based or founded on...
More than 50% of marriages end in divorce, but I'm quite sure less than 50% of aspiring models "make it." For a change, the odds favor a serious relationship.
You really should just choose your passion: your partner or your career. Which are you more passionate about. Well written and point well made... I agree to the fullest...
Makeup Artist
Reese
Posts: 1136
Newport News, Virginia, US
I am not without a heart, I bleed and cry... I fear and I love.
I would rather have a love like no other than a modeling career.
Photographer
Tropical Photography
Posts: 35564
Sarasota, Florida, US
Posted by XtremeArtists �:
Posted by Reese:
Hypothetical:
Person one in relationship wants to model. Person one will leave person two if person two does not support the modeling endeavor... or visa versa. There seems to be no compromise. Should person one sacrifice person one's hopes to be a model to satisfy person two, the love of person one's life?
The question now is how strong is either's love? If there is no sacrifice on one or the other's side, the relationship is doomed. Who must sacrifice? Who makes that call?
And who are we to sit and judge and say, "leave your significant other," when we the outside have no idea what the relationship is based or founded on...
More than 50% of marriages end in divorce, but I'm quite sure less than 50% of aspiring models "make it." For a change, the odds favor a serious relationship.
You really should just choose your passion: your partner or your career. Which are you more passionate about. Actually Extreme, I believe the national average is more in the 65% range for divorce; and here in Sarasota according to a divorce attorney, it's more like 75%..
One of the areas I work in is wedding photography and it's surprising how many weddings I've done and wondered if the couple will get through the first year. Even had a couple of couples that I wondered if they would make it long enough to get their wedding album!!
As I think I stated earlier, there are too many people that are hung up on the quality of the package and not the content. No, I'm not a hipocrite (sp), A tight little body and sexy smile will garner my attention faster then the plain Jane, but when really looked at, that plain Jane may be more beautiful then the tight little bod. Why? Because of what's inside the person; the part that usually never changes unlike the physical package.
The other issue is that so few people today consider their S O to be their best friend. Yet, look at couple that have been together for 30-40-50 years plus and they typically state that their success is due to "never going to bed mad" and "she/he is my best friend". I know women that have flat told me that a lover does not have to be your best friend and usually isn't.. Commom thread to these women, they were in relationships that were controlling, manipulative and abusive.. The statistics bear the real story.
Unfortunately we are a very visually driven society that is also disposable. I mean, how many times have people bought something because it was so damn cool looking but in reality it was a hunk of crap and didn't last a month. Sorry, people fall into that category, too.
Perhaps if we took the time to investigate our potential S O they way we do a major financial purchase, we would make better choices. Afterall, did you buy your last car because it was hot or because you researched for the best model to meet your needs.. Yea, that's a bit clinical, but there is truth to the example.
Model
Carlie Lawson
Posts: 904
Longtown, Oklahoma, US
Bravo, photofashion! You've got it right. If there's someone trying to control you, you should leave.
Photographer
- null -
Posts: 4576
Posted by Reese:
Should person one sacrifice person one's hopes to be a model to satisfy person two, the love of person one's life?
The question now is how strong is either's love? If there is no sacrifice on one or the other's side, the relationship is doomed. Who must sacrifice? Who makes that call?
And who are we to sit and judge and say, "leave your significant other," when we the outside have no idea what the relationship is based or founded on...
Does love conqure all or does modeling do it? If love is not more important than modeling, then tis a sad day... You're missing the point.
The choice isn't between "true love" or "modeling career."
The choice is between "supportive relationship" or "manipulative relationship."
I could never love someone who didn't support my hopes and ambitions.
If a person says, "Pick me or the career" then the career wins. Always.
NOT because a career is more important. But because I demand that my shieldmaiden always has my back, just as I will always have hers.
Model
Rose Noir
Posts: 591
Chicago, Illinois, US
Does this guy try to control your every move?
Model
Alli B
Posts: 906
Syracuse, New York, US
man i have been down this road with my boyfriend....ive been modelling before we have even started dating and he knew this....then when it came to me moving in with him, my career was booming, i had so many planned shoots and stuff, and some that were out of state with expenses paid mind you...ive missed out shoots in NC and MD because he threatened me to break up if i went, im like for christs sakes its only a weekend and ive done my research on these photographers before actually committing to a shoot...well as a result of it all, i didnt go because i had loved him dearly...but in my mind i should have said fine, and would have ended it...but i stayed....couple months later, he decides he wanted to go back to school, and take up photography...at the time i didnt know what the reason was, i told this to some of the photogs im close with and they told me because he was jealous....and i thought about it too that way, but i never asked about his intentions...all i got was that he was an "artist" in a way(before all this he was a musician and wanted to get out of his current business)...so he has been going to school, taking courses in photography, im practically his guinea pig for shoots, which i dont have a problem with because i was helping him out....now that a couple of semesters have passed, hes been shooting better and has been learning a lot on his own and attending with me to photoshoots...its like he did a complete 360 and now is very supportive of me and my modelling...i help him to get models to the studio for shooting and stuff and help them too, so in the end things got much better, but earlier i could relate to all you models and photogs about this situation cause it happened to me once 
Model
aye provide
Posts: 1330
New York, New York, US
My answer is be single. Modeling is not some magical profession. If you are career serious and this is what you do to make money then controlling behavior need to go.
Do you think a woman studying engineering would not have a simalar condition??? If you thought no the you are dead wrong...the differencr betweem them and models is that they tend to see what is on the table( after plunking down atleast 20K per year at a top school )and dumb the zero.
2yrs ...so what you have youth on your side go for yours.
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