Because of out of all the clowns in this place.. all it takes is to meet ONE person that will make it all worth it.

Also, because the link back to my personal page helps me in the google searches! =P

Why am I here?... hmmmmm... well... it happened late one dark, rainy, thunder-struck night.  I made the dreadful mistake of walking down this Bill Gates one way dead end road (damn him) of Window XP Pro... porn everywhere... scammers by the millions... shitmail abounding... chatroom lurkers preyin on innocent schoolgirls... what a SERIOUSLY fucked up neighborhood this is.  As I reached the end of the road, I saw a pleasant looking light coming from an alley just ahead.  The sign above the alley read 'Model Mayhem'... and I said to myself... COOL... this alley could be my saving grace... my only salvation... and quite possibly the ONLY opportunity for me to get out ALIVE!  I simply HAD to go for it, as this one way street left me NO WHERE else to turn...

I loggin in, typed in a few details about myself and what I do, then was asked to download images.  Sooooooooo... I pulled out the photo CD... scrolled thru piles of my smokin shots... but found out that I could only download 20 pics... come onnnnnnn... I got HUNDREDS here... I'd GLADLY pay for 20 or 40 more... and who the hell is this 'Tyler' dude askin to be my friend?  I dont know this guy from JACK... and it says here I can delete him?... HELL YEAH... you're outta here loser... you look like a freakin nerd anyway... OPPS... DAMN... just found out that dude runs the place... OH FUCK... open mouth... insert foot... you're makin a GREAT impression now Gary. 

OK... posted the 20 pics on the photo page... done deal.  Now it says I have to type in some info about me and some credits... soooooooo... I fabricate a mountain of flattering lies... working wonders while shitting blunders... makin myself look like freakin SUPERMAN... I mean what the fuck... everybody else is.  And what the hell are all these people askin to see pics of ME for?... whos gives a fuck what I look like?... alriiiiiiiight... here's my pic with that 'Queen of Narnia' slut... GAWD... I hate that hobag... fuckin with those poor little kids in that flick like she did... that bitch DESERVED to die! 

Alright... got my personal page done... now Im trippin down the 'Forums' hallway... checkin out all the messages on the boards... DAMN... will ya look at this garbage... there's some SERIOUSLY stupid losers postin some lameass shit up in dis hizzy... GWC's askin questions like 'At what point during my illustrious career do I upgrade from my 110 cartridge camera to a 1meg digital?'... ROTFLMAO!  Oooooook... we know that moron has no clue... NEXT!  Cool... a 'Model Matters' forum... maybe they'll be some fiiiiiiiiine babes pullin up a barstool here.  OH MY GAWD... here's a 17 year old bimbo graduate of John Robert Powers and Barbizon... pity her poor mommie's maxed out VISA card... thinkin she can get a 1000 bucks an hour for fashion... JEEEEEEZSUS!... nice webcam avatar ya got there girl... captured from 40 feet away... there could be a whole 5 pixels covering your facial details... hey... I can almost make out the fact that you're a female...  

Wow... they got a chatroom... WAY COOL... but WHY is it called a 'Shoutbox'?... are there people screamin in here or what?... OK... I'll scope it out for abit... HOLY SHIT... will ya look at this Tiger chick... DAMN... she's typin like 500 words a minute... but what the hell is she sayin?... must be some kinda New York slang er somethin... that chick should come equipped with an enterpreter... yeah... ok... so I misspelled 'enterpreter'... so where the fuck is the spell check?... Alright... Im over the shoutbox... outta here.  Think I'll do a 'browse' for model hotties in my hood.  OH HELL YEAH... there's some MAJORLY tasty babes in this pad... sure beats the hell outta that 'Obnoxious Management Place'... I could be scopin out these girlies for hours... I'll get back to this later.  What a minute!... how are all these people postin announcements on the front page?... yeah right... 'New Pics Up... Check'm Out'... oh paleeeeeeze... this is a new site dipstick... EVERYBODY's go new pics up... WTF!  And last but not least... ZOWIE!... who is this tasty little blonde morsal at the top of the page wearin the white feather boa and reflective shades?... DAMN... what the hell is her MM number?... I'd book that cutie in a heartbeat...

Because they won't let me leave.

I'm here to watch BCG and Raveneyes have at each other in the forums

i am here to build up my low self esteem.

i am here to woo Theda...i already have a deal w/VH1 for a reality TV show which will document the process.

I have met some wonderful people on MM.  Yes, it is so dreadful to read the same cr$p over and over.
But, I also have the patience to sift through Century 21 on a rainy day. 
It is also nice to see some people whose work I have admired for ages.  I can email them, talk to them.  Bounce ideas off them.
And I have met makeup artists and hair and wardrobe people from all over the world.  That is cool.

Why am I here? I'm addicted.

Why did I come here in the first place? To figure out how to build a career in fashion and editorial photography. I needed a break from not making movies in graduate film school and ended up in New York taking pictures.

Is it working? Dunno. Maybe.

The free donuts and soft core porn

Wow that is such a classic existential question.

I am here, because I am not somewhere else.  (Kiirkegarde sp)

I made my own hell and now I live in it and it just happens to be here.  (Jean Paul Sarte)

I may be here but the rest of you may be a dream. (Decartes)

No matter where you go, there you are. (Buckaroo Banzai)



Now back to your regularly scheduled, individual realities.

Because OMP wasn't doing IT for me

To network, learn more about others (photographers and models) work and point of view.
I got some valuable information on the forums.

1.  To network with photographers, makeup artists, stylists, and models.
2.  The scenery's pretty.
3.  To expose people to a kind of art and modeling that is, as yet, fairly unusual.
4.  I like to talk.  Type.  Whatever.

i'm here to work and improve as a photographer.  it's also a great place to network.  this site has great potential.  hopefully it won't get ruined.  hopefully, it will stay positive and knowledge based.

I am here because i am a genius at procrastination, and I should be doing some editing. Oh, and also I have found many friends here, just delete the ones that get on the GWC and TFP and flying spaghetti monster threads...
There are some great artists on here.

Oh, and I expect to be the next betty page....

I'm here because I enjoy looking at the work of others, reading the various diatribes in the forums (and occasionally joining the fray), meeting potential models, and because I live approximately in the middle of nowhere, so it's nice to find people of similar interests.
Oh, and to exhibit my brilliant work so that the masses might be inspired.

I am here. Therefore I am?

I was told by a few people that M.M had more people who like to shoot Alt Models. And I find that to be very true. I have found many wonderful Photographers, Desingers, and Models to work with here.

got a webcam and I am ready...oh..and...hot chicks....

I am here to promote and build my photography business.  I just recently relocated to Florida and I am trying to get my name out there. 

www.andreapender.com

To start getting into your minds.....

....they will be opened

I'm here because I get to meet stunning models like Adriana: (Mayhem #88472)

To find photographers. I love doing photo shoots. They're so much fun. And some extra cash is always good.

here's why i'm here:



to party it up with the girlies woohoo!